1. |
Conditionally Female
02:04
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Fuck off
Get lost
Never wanna see your face
I’m not your plaything
Treat me like I’m human or don’t fucking touch me
Who I am is who I am
You don’t wanna see that I don’t give a damn
You better fucking respect me
Even when you’re not inside thy
Never negotiate identity
I’ll never be your fucking "she"
Never see me eye to eye
I see right through your games you couldn’t even hide
Eat my gender non conforming
Ass
My ass
Dilate
Don’t you try to fucking lie with me
Your attempts are futile filled in vain
Fetishize me dehumanizing
Back the fuck off
How I exist in your fucked up mind
It never meets the reality
I’ll never be yours
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2. |
Dysphoric Hunger
01:45
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Enslaved by thee and I wanna be set free
And I try how I try for the cycle just repeats
This body’s torture now I’m burning up alive
Feel the tears down my face filled with shame and defeat
Hungry and starving I crave to fill the void
Just to relish in the peace but I know it will retreat
My fuel my poison dilemma of duality
You beat me to the floor steal the life away from me
(Gluttony) (Disgusts me)
I hate what I’ve become
(Gluttony) (Disgusts me)
I feel sick down to my
Bones
Destroyed my body nothing seems to ever work
Try to heal from my scars but it only makes things worse
I’ll never get to be so pretty tiny frail and thin
Pain heat from the fire and the fire from the heat
(Gluttony) (Disgusts me)
Of what I won’t become
(Gluttony) (Disgusts me)
That’ll never get to be
Me
Femininity robbed away from me
Thrown to waste my body no desirability
Dying here you seemed to never care
Am I undeserving
Of love
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3. |
Downwards Spiral
01:18
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Slit my throat and slit my wrists
These thoughts of mine they will never subside
A false facade of lies and guilt
I just want to be someone anyone but me
Feeling paranoid naked and exposed
All eyes on me knowing all to be
Don't wanna eat nor can I sleep
Hanging by a thread can't take it anymore
Torment living inside my mind
Never getting any better
Is there something wrong with me
Can't process my reality
Hate my life and everything it creates
I'm not ok in miserability
Feeling so lonely living day by day
My cry for help I plead I weep
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4. |
One More Hour
02:40
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Give me one more
Hour, please, I miss you come back
To spend another day with you the things that I'd do
I took you for granted, how wrong of me
The silence so loud not having you here
Never thought you'd be gone this soon
Now I carry my guilt how I should've loved you
Through pain and fall you were by my side
Undeserving of you but still you cared
Memories stuck playing back in my mind
Holding you in my arms staring into your eyes
Knowing all of that would eventually end
Feeling your warmth it was bitter it was sweet
Tried to pretend and I tried to forget
Didn't wanna go not without you near
Life was drained from the body I love
One moment you were here and the next you were
Gone
My sister is dead
I try to run I don't wanna know this loss
It's a pain it's a struggle I don't know how I'll go on
Pretending as if you were never even here
Feels so fucking wrong but how can I survive
Thinking of you it brings me to my knees
Now I'm sobbing on the floor waiting for the day we'll meet
In my heart you'll always be there forever
It's not enough I feel so alone
Don't know when it will ever get better
As I sit here in sorrow can't be fucked what to do
My wounds are open and I really feel it sting
I slow myself down
Please forgive me
I'm sorry
I miss you
I loved you
And I still do
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